This is my very first Buzznet Story Tellers Group assignment so I apologize if it's a tad bit..weird? I'm pondering ways on how I can explain my story without being cryptic. When I found out that this week's assignment was about wishes, I just knew I had to chime in on this one. Enjoy..and again, I'm sorry if it's a bit hazy.
I've been doing a whole lot of wishing lately. On stars at night. At church. At home, lying in bed at night, trying not to overthink. While listening to music in my room. At this point, I'd say about 90% of my life is spent on wishing, hoping and praying. For what, you ask? I really wish I could tell you, but to be fair, they do say that your wishes won't come true if you tell. Anyway, even if I did tell, you'd probably send me to Crazy Town anyway so let's just remain friends, mmkay? :D
I literally cannot listen to "A Dream Is A Wish Your Heart Makes" from Disney without bawling my eyes out like a crazy person. There's this notion that if you keep believing, miracles will happen. Some days, I feel on top of the world; like those things I'm wishing for may actually come true. I'm noticing the signs everywhere and all roads point to that one wish, but other days it feels like my world is crumbling and it will never happen. Something is in the way right now, and I'm not sure if it will ever go away and that scares me. But I won't ever give up. Ever.
Here's the thing about wishes and dreams: you can't give up. In my eyes, you simply have no choice. I've watched so many people give up on things they've always wanted because it got too hard. I know it's exausting. I know it feels like your heart is being torn apart because the timing may not be right. But if you give up on these things, you're going to spend the rest of your life wondering "what if?" I don't want that. Regret is ugly. It's been a part of my life for way too long and it needs to go.
I guess that's basically my wish: a chance. A chance to see if this can actually work. If not, I'll know and I won't be wandering through the rest of my life tormented by my past decisions. I know with every fiber of my being that it will work, but I just need that chance. Sometimes I'm wrong. I don't mind being wrong once I know I've experienced it firsthand.
If this wish of mine ever does come true, I'm sure you'll hear me shouting it from the rooftops. If not, maybe I'll write a book about it some day...with a happier ending. Maybe I won't even need to make it a work of fiction. With all hope, maybe it might come true. All I need is a little bit of serendipity. ♥